And to think that I heard it on Blvd East!

This is one of those stories you just can’t make up.

Overheard at the park was a woman, definitely not from the neighborhood, she was the kind of ghetto who dresses in “expensive” clothes but you can tell by the way she talks she’s dumb as a door knob.  Let’s call her Ghetto Bimbo.

Anyway, Ghetto Bimbo is talking to this lady who has many children, at least four, all under the age of 5 and made a remark about not being able to bend when one of the children she herself is watching drops something.

The woman asks if she had a c section, to which Ghetto Bimbo replies that no, she just got back from Mexico last night after having a gastric sleeve put in yesterday afternoon.

Thus ensues the most fucked up conversation I have eavesdropped on in a long time.

Now before I go any further, I have to say that Ghetto Bimbo was what one in the hood would call thick.  Definitely not over weight, no one in their right mind would call her obese.  

Apparently, Ghetto Bimbo had been trying for months to get her insurance to approve the sleeve.  They wouldn’t.  Which of course they wouldn’t, it’s for morbidly obese people.  I have only met one person in my life who ever had it done and she had been over 300 pounds!  Everyone else I know did keto or Atkins or trained military style with their brother (love you both Dave and Jenny!)

She continues to say that she saved little by little, got money from her sister and boyfriend whose daughter she was at the park with, and managed to come up with the 8000 dollars that would pay for her to go to Mexico and get this surgery done.

She explained that she spent weeks researching and found the perfect doctor who runs a spa there where patients stay to recuperate, but I guess she didn’t need to stay?  Or maybe she didn’t have the money, who knows?  She didn’t elaborate.

In any case, the doctor did this surgery laparoscopically all the stitching was inside her and she showed the tape to this total stranger.  Who does this at a public park with a complete stranger you just met?

Now here is the kicker.  Not only can she not bend at that moment, but she can’t drink water.  I don’t mean she’s fasting.  I mean she said she can’t drink any water because it won’t go down, the woman can’t swallow.

Bitch, that’s not supposed to happen.  A liquid diet is the only thing you can have after a gastric sleeve.  I’ve seen the medical documentaries, they make sure those patients drink their water, no sugary things and maybe a clear broth.  It’s part of the after patient care.

If Ghetto Bimbo couldn’t drink water, someone fucked up somewhere, and that’s besides the fact that she was outside less than 24 hours after getting this shit done and took a plane ride to boot in the middle of a global fucking pandemic!

Like didn’t you research how people literally die from elective surgeries like that down there?

Probably not cause she saw no other option to her losing weight.  I mean a fucking Pelaton would have been cheaper.  Shit, I wish someone would buy me a Pelaton so I could cycle when it’s cold!  

Part of me feels really bad, who in her life made her believe that she was fat?  Who in her life told her, yeah you need to drastically loose weight because otherwise you will die from obesity related co morbidities.  Did her boyfriend not even make the suggestion, hey, if you want to get it shape, let’s go to the gym together, let’s cook more at home, let’s see a nutritionist together.  We got this babe, I’m gonna help you achieve your goals, let’s get healthy together.

Nah, cause that’s what well adjusted couples do who know that a fucking Pelaton is cheaper!

I really hope it wasn’t him that put that shit in her head.  But she never said.  Insecurity is a bitch, but asshole boyfriend’s are even bigger bitches.

I hope she’s ok, and not in the ICU with necrosis or something scary.  I’ve seen the botched surgery shows too.

The bottom line is, love your bodies dear readers.  Weight can be a scary issue, but shit, eat a fucking cucumber, don’t go to Mexico during the plague for unlicensed surgery.