Midsummer’s Eve

 

One day, I will be there for real!

Midsummer’s Eve is technically today since Litha is tomorrow.  Today we had a relaxing day with friends at their pool.  We did nothing, and that’s what I like on a lazy summer Saturday afternoon.  They barbecued so I didn’t even need to cook lunch or dinner!  I brought dolmades and a massive chickpea salad.

I have been so tired lately.  Sometimes the days just run together, I’ve also been getting a bit too many migraines which is so not cool.  I wonder if it’s the heat?  I think tomorrow I will be doing something to release and let some much needed bright solar energy into my life.  I may even sun brew my nettle tea tomorrow.

This morning I put together the slides for tonight’s class on the summer solstice.  19 slides all together, it took me about half an hour to do the entire class with technical difficulties in between.  Sometimes at night the internet goes berserk for absolutely no reason.  Yes, I pay for the absolute cheapest internet available, but damn it Optimum, can it at least work sometimes?

Tomorrow is also Father’s Day, which of course sucks.  With Dino never being here, and Shadow gone, who do I celebrate?  I sent my dad a card with a deer on it, cause the man loves deer and that is that.  Most of my friends don’t have dad’s in their lives, so it’s just another day for them.  When Dino was in the lower grades he’d give his Father’s Day gift to my dad cause we lived with them.  Ana brought home her Father’s Day craft and she made everything for me, writing “mommy” on it all.  I kinda wanted her to make things for her uncles or my dad, but I didn’t think to even tell the teacher.  

Being a single mom with Dino and doing all the work was not the same as being a widow with Ana and doing all the work.  I was proud to do it all and get shit done without his dad doing much of anything.  But this, this is sad, and it fucking sucks.  Shadow never got a Father’s Day craft from school from Ana and that’s just so unbelievably upsetting for me.

So, tomorrow we shall concentrate on midsummer.  We’ll get out and get some sun and make some tea, and have a slow, and simple Sunday afternoon.  I think I also want to make a couple of new God’s eyes to hang on the wall.  Again, nothing crazy.

Let the sun shine in!

🌻